Thursday, September 01, 2005

Things You Don't Want to Hear at the Orthodontist

  • The kid next to you choking on his spit
  • Get me the gauze...quick!
  • Don't worry, I can fix this.
  • Hey Cheryl, come look at this- I've never seen anything like it!
  • Yeah, you're going to have to come back, like every week for the next four years.
  • Uh-oh!
  • We're going to have to extract a few more permanent teeth.
  • Can you feel a little pressure?
  • Those wires definitely need to be tightened.
  • Make sure you have plenty of soft foods stocked.
  • And here's your bill...we've got a great payment plan.

My List

Reasons that baseball is the worst sport ever.

-Someone is throwing a ball at you while you are holding a bat and you are supposed to hit the ball instead of the guy throwing it at you.

-The Senate spends more time on talking about the sport's steroid usage than doing something productive like, say, fixing social security, balancing the budget or rectifying the Iraq situation.

-Players wearing skin tight pants: is it really necessary?

-Umpires turn the word "your out' into a primative neanderthal grunt "uurroott!!!"

-Steriods are rampant in a none contact sport.

-In a game that is supposed to be Americas pastime most Americans can't even pronounce half of the players names.

-It is the only sport where players are allowed tobacco products on field and they don't do it any more.

-Bush was part owner of the Rangers.